A Letter from The Editor (November 2018)
A Letter from The Editor:
Founder, Lead Instructor, Editor… Serve Yoga puts me behind it all. I aim to share my favorite topics in this letter in the hope it brings some fresh, always real, perspective to your feed. Here are my wise words on Veganism, Relationships and Happiness & Success for November.
YES, I finally gave up dairy! After a lifetime of being vegetarian (I have never tried meat) & loving my gouda cheese & paneer (I’m the East Indian who grew up on the West Indian island)… I did it. It has been 7-weeks & overall – fact is, it’s what you make of it. I take it one day at a time. It is a change I have always wanted to make but time & time again wrote it off as too big a challenge. If there is a will then there is a way & my will was born.
I’ll elaborate: I have loved ones who are vegan & would often come across really queasy content of the dairy industry via their feeds. Like the rest of the world, I would turn a blind eye to the harsh realities of animal cruelty in the dairy industry AND the fact that the industry is something I absolutely do not endorse. Eventually it dawned on me that I was just emulating the exact behavior of all those who chose to look away from the situation & pretend it doesn’t exist. My actions were exactly that of a hypocrite – I would watch in confusion at those who eat meat from these factory farms without a single flinch or second-thought at the history & origins of the chicken wing or beef burger, yet I thought that since I ‘only ate dairy’ it wasn’t actually ‘that bad’.
But really – it’s all the same freakin’ industry. I’m working to be a better version of myself everyday & I knew that it was time to put that two-faced behavior behind me. I haven’t looked back since. I know my decisions every day play a greater role in Economics. Every time I buy more olive oil instead of butter I am casting my vote in the production. I am affecting the statistics of what the grocery stores need to stock more of & overall influencing the food industry as a consumer. It’s menial, but it counts.
And so – I created Serve Vegan… my new lifelong venture to share everything plant-based with you. For your body & for our environment. More to share on Serve Vegan another time, stay tuned for recipes, restaurant reviews & yes... eventually products!
I have drawn blank on who the universe believes is the right life partner for me. I have not found Mr. Right. Do I believe he exists? Yes. How? Well... because I’m Miss Right. ;) Ha-ha. Actually though, I feel I have a fair bit of relationship experience to speak on this topic so here goes…
Every relationship takes work (primarily - time, effort, compromise & understanding). Know your non-negotiables. Know what you need individually to feel supported & identify what you are willing to share to support. Don’t f*ck with your non-negotiables. I found myself in situations (yes, more than once) with sincere feelings & great intentions involved yet my one non-negotiable was disrespected repeatedly. You might say – ‘scumbags’… you’re such a Goddess who would ever let you down?
Ladies… hear me loud & clear. I’ll say it loudly & clearly. IT’S NOT YOU.
We live in a fast-tracked world. Everything is ephemeral & many of us have accepted even our planet will not sustain. This doesn’t mean that your relationship has to be this way. That doesn’t mean your worth depreciates with the seasons. Let them chase those skirts – I encourage you to vibrate higher. Know that every time you look down on someone you pull your frequency down one notch. It’s not worth it. He’s not worth it.
Don’t be surprised when your ex spends forever looking for someone just like you – one who likes the same music & poems and one who cooks with the same passion & love. I hope this brings you peace. Silly boys, they always reflect & come around when it’s too late. It’s not your problem.
You have to, have to, have to find somebody who has the capacity to love like you do. Believe you me, not all humans out there love the same, with the same open & unconditional heart you have. I learned this the long way, very recently. For various reasons, humans cap their love. Fact is there are gold-plated humans out there. I can tell you from working in the fine jewelry industry for many, many years – that’s the charm of gold-plated pieces. You don’t know what is underneath until the piece breaks & at that point it’s too damn late.
From someone as mentally, physically & emotionally aligned as myself with a heart of gold... I can only say be weary. Gold-plated individuals carry their facades. They’re so caught up in their own impressions; They mock concepts & use nice words but please, pay attention to their behaviors. If you’ve ever worked with gold-plated pieces, you’ll know the shine always wears off. If you’re meticulous, you’ll notice. Proceed with caution. Personally, I prefer when the piece exposes itself sooner than later. In turn, each relationship has made me sharper & I promise I’ll find someone who is gold on the inside too & doesn’t just pretend, or just intend to be.
Love takes an immense amount of courage. Today, my Dad told me “When two people love each other they go till the ends of the earth for each other.” But know that this love takes bravery. Do you know all of Earth's vast lands & deep oceans? 'Cuz I don't. But the journey to the ends of the Earth doesn't account for such known factors. I know I need someone who does not become arid & lifeless in the face of trepidation or the unknown. It requires character. My parents are the epitome of courage. They chose love over fear everyday. I always will too.
I came across this video & am sharing it because it’s really worth a watch. In my Serve Yoga classes, I always teach ‘you eat what [thoughts] you feed yourself.’ If you feed yourself positivity & hope you can bet that is what you’ll have to digest. Give this a 2-minute view.
And if none of this resonates with you, J. Cole put it beautifully in his iconic song Love Yourz. “Always gon' be a b*tch that's badder out there on the tours. But you ain't never gon' be happy till you love yours.” It’ll be a timeless favorite. Find me a man who gets it like J. Cole does. Sisters, if you have a brother who gets it – holla. My experience having two brothers has taught me that boys who grow up with sisters have found their respect for the female at an earlier age, that’s all. My brothers know how to treat a lady. God bless their future partners.
Happiness & Financial Success
Correlation is not causation. As an Entrepreneur, the struggle is so real. But I can say I’m the happiest I have ever been. I’ve done the 9am-5pm. I’ve done the family business. So far, there has been nothing like Serve Yoga. My brand. I choose the opportunities I want to pursue. I choose the classes I want to teach. I choose the people I surround myself with. Yes, the money will come & I feel like I’m constantly balling on a budget… but I go to bed every night super satisfied. I know I’m in a rare place & many look on enviously. The money is important, but it just doesn’t make me happy. A passion & purpose for my work does.
The happiness starts with you. Are you at peace in your own skin? Are you at peace with the foods you eat? Are you at peace with the way you treat your body? Are you at peace with the words you speak to the ones you love? It starts with you.
I briefly dated a guy who was so unhappy in many aspects of his life, but making more money than he could assess or spend. It was an eye-opener. His routine was a killer & his hours were deadly. There was no time to live his precious youth. I’ve been a true-believer of ‘mo money mo problems’ (thanks B.I.G.).
I’ll give you the perfect example. I moved into a bigger apartment from my tiny downtown Toronto apartment. It’s fantastic to have all this practice space & a massive functional desk I’m using right now. Also, a sweet kitchen with a bunch of counter space to make all my Serve Vegan meals. But damn, the maintenance involved. The wall art required to cover the walls & furniture expenses to cover grounds. The more times I have to do laundry of the floor mats & cleaning rags. The longer time it takes to do one sweep. Our family of 5 grew up in a comfortable 3-bedroom house & my mom always used to say… big house, big problems. Fact. Mom's always right.
Yes, there is happiness in getting that promotion because it is a result of hard-work & perseverance. Yes, there is happiness in getting praise from your boss because it’s a display of commitment & dedication. But what ELSE makes you happy? What else do you display? Kindness to yourself? Honesty with others? Pursuance of a new hobby? Sharing or teaching something? Recycling, maybe? It’s the small things.
I think we too often mistake the power of financial success & its role in bringing happiness to our lives. It is a great complement & a great way to accompany a satisfied life but by no means should your financial success be the basis for your happiness. Let that sit.
Thanks for your time Serve Yoga readers, I hope you continue your week with all the inspo you need on these topics. Please leave your comments & feedback. Do share! Bless up, beautiful people.
Love & light,